How can I top without losing my erection?
January 20, 2008
I'm 26 years old. I'm still trying to figure out whether I'm a top or a bottom, cause it feels real good to have a hard dick rubbing against my ass gently. It makes me cum. I tried getting a six-inch dildo in and it works, so I guess I'm anally-competent! But my problem has to do with being a top. Every time I gotta wear a condom, I lose my hard-on. The rubber reduces my sensitivity, and I don't want to bareback either. It's embarrassing, and I screwed up some really good dates and potential long term relationships with some really nice guys. Heeelllp!
Welcome to the club, friend. Condoms are difficult for many of us, but fortunately there are several steps you can take to make wearing them easier.
First, make sure you're wearing a condom that is large enough for you. If it's too tight or uncomfortable, you may need to buy an extra-large size one. You may want to experiment with different types of condoms as well. Although ultra-thin condoms are more liable to break, they give you a greater sensitivity. Some men prefer polyurethane condoms as well, especially because those can be used with oil-based lubricants
Second, abstain from cumming for a three or four days before topping. Although individuals vary, that's the length of time the porn community has found helps tops stay hard the best.
Third, play with your bottom's butt and get him all lubed up before you worry about getting yourself ready to go. If you put on the condom then loosen him up, you will lose your erection by the time he's ready to take your dick. Consider dildoing him for a while so he'll really be ready to take your dick, rather than wait while his sphincter muscles adjust.
Forth, when you're topping, experiment with different positions. Lots of bottoms like to sit on the top while he lays on his back, but that doesn't help the top stay hard very well. Positions that allow you maximum thrusting power are likely to benefit you the most. Obviously, positions that you fantasize about will help, too.
Fifth, buy a leather cockring and use it. It makes it tougher to get an erection, but helps maintain one once you have it. You may find that helps you stay harder while you fuck your partner.
Sixth, consider waiting until later in your sex session before you fuck your partner. There's nothing wrong with masturbating and getting yourself really close to the edge before you roll on a condom and dive in.
Finally, consider getting prescription from Viagra. You can do that online quite easily, although it's not necessarily in your best medical interest to do so. It certainly helps most people stay hard, and taking one an hour before you want to top is likely to give you that edge to stay rock hard.
aGive these a try and see if they help. I'll be willing to bet that they do.
First, make sure you're wearing a condom that is large enough for you. If it's too tight or uncomfortable, you may need to buy an extra-large size one. You may want to experiment with different types of condoms as well. Although ultra-thin condoms are more liable to break, they give you a greater sensitivity. Some men prefer polyurethane condoms as well, especially because those can be used with oil-based lubricants
Second, abstain from cumming for a three or four days before topping. Although individuals vary, that's the length of time the porn community has found helps tops stay hard the best.
Third, play with your bottom's butt and get him all lubed up before you worry about getting yourself ready to go. If you put on the condom then loosen him up, you will lose your erection by the time he's ready to take your dick. Consider dildoing him for a while so he'll really be ready to take your dick, rather than wait while his sphincter muscles adjust.
Forth, when you're topping, experiment with different positions. Lots of bottoms like to sit on the top while he lays on his back, but that doesn't help the top stay hard very well. Positions that allow you maximum thrusting power are likely to benefit you the most. Obviously, positions that you fantasize about will help, too.
Fifth, buy a leather cockring and use it. It makes it tougher to get an erection, but helps maintain one once you have it. You may find that helps you stay harder while you fuck your partner.
Sixth, consider waiting until later in your sex session before you fuck your partner. There's nothing wrong with masturbating and getting yourself really close to the edge before you roll on a condom and dive in.
Finally, consider getting prescription from Viagra. You can do that online quite easily, although it's not necessarily in your best medical interest to do so. It certainly helps most people stay hard, and taking one an hour before you want to top is likely to give you that edge to stay rock hard.
aGive these a try and see if they help. I'll be willing to bet that they do.
