How can I get rid of excess body hair?
January 21, 2008
I have a hairy lower bottom meaning ass and legs. I am too embarrassed to go for a waxing especially on my butt. I also don't want to shave because I have heard rumors that shaving would cause the hair to return much thicker and coarser that before.
Can you recommend an at home method that will prevent this from happening? I tried Nair and wound up with red prickly skin for two weeks (thank god I tested it on a small portion of my ass).
Can you recommend an at home method that will prevent this from happening? I tried Nair and wound up with red prickly skin for two weeks (thank god I tested it on a small portion of my ass).
There are several ways to remove hair without shaving. Let's look at them one at a time.
The Nair Method - Nair is a hair-removal cream. It works by dissolving hair, and works with a fair amount of effectiveness. It may not quite get all of the hair on an area though, and causes reactions in some people. Always test it on a small area of your body a day before you plan on really using it. Nair is not a permanent solution.
Waxing - Waxing involves putting a special wax-type stuff on part of your body (it goes on at a lower temperature than regular wax, so it doesn't hurt), and then giving it one really big yank to pull the hair out. The good point of this is that it's cheap and effective. The downside is that it hurts and that the hair grows back thicker. It's probably not a good solution if you have a particularly thick patch of hair, or want to wax large parts of your body. Waxing is usually done in (straight and gay) salons, but I believe some (less effective) home options exist.
Consider waxing more of a temporary option for a big date rather than an effective long-term solution. Waxing is not a permanent solution.
Electrolysis - Electrolysis involves a certified professional using small electric shocks to destroy the hair follicles over a long period of time. It requires more than one session, and usually leaves a rash for two or three days after the appointment. It is a more expensive solution than waxing (often costing $20-40 or more per session depending on your needs), and must be done every several weeks for up to a year or more. It also has the added downside of being somewhat painful, like a small bee sting every time they remove a hair.
During electrolysis, the shock damages the hair follicle. The bigger the shock, the more it hurts, but the more damage the follicle takes. The hair is then plucked out with a pair of tweezers. Over the next few weeks the hair grows back in, but over several sessions becomes noticeably thinner. Eventually the follicle takes so much damage it ceases producing a hair at all, although this can take a year or more depending on your body and particular type of hair.
Laser Hair Removal - In recent years, laser hair removal has emerged as a new option. It typically only takes a few sessions, but must be done by a qualified practitioner over a longer period of time. The advantage is that it is less painful than the other options, and does become permanent. The downside is that it is very expensive, costing anywhere from $1.5k and up depending on your needs. There are relatively few side effects of laser surgery.
"Miracle" Cures - There are a number of websites on the 'net claiming to sell pills and vitamins you can take at home to help slow your hair growth. Often these products are marketed towards athletes desiring a smooth form. Such claims are typically not verified by the US Food and Drug Administration, and should be considered highly suspect. It's easy to believe these products work when you want to believe in them, but they have never needed to prove their effectiveness in the past. I don't recommend any of these at-home miracle solutions, and suggest you avoid this option.
Regarding embarrassment when looking for a a place to have your (chest, butt, dick) hair removed, I know it's a tough issue. A lot of places aren't hip to the desires of many men to be smooth, especially in more sexual parts of the body. When looking for a place to have this done, your best is to start by looking in your local gay bar guide. These are ideal advertising opportunities for hair removal companies. You may also want to try your local gay/lesbian info line for suggestions, particularly in non-urban areas. They may act a little funny on the phone, but may have a few suggestions for you.
If you are looking to have your genitals or butt it is always a good idea to call the company to confirm in advance they are willing to remove hair in that area of the body. Many places are A-ok with doing it, although some will politely request you seek another location. In that case, don't be embarrassed and hang up. Ask them if they can provide you a referral. They are likely to do so if they know of a good place for you.
Once you set up your appointment, you should be in good shape. Waxing and electrolysis are commonly done by women, although laser surgery will vary. Don't be embarrassed if a woman is working on you - they're professionals at their business and are well-used to it. I had my chest hair (I do have a small amount) electrolyzed, and asked the woman if there was any part of the body she wouldn't work on. Her reply was, "I've done it all, many times..." One other thought - don't forget to tip your the person helping you out. It's customary. : )
Whatever you do, DO NOT EVER stop going out, meeting people, and having sex because you are self-conscious. Hair (like weight, age, or any other attribute) is an individual preference. No matter how smooth or hairy you are, there are a lot of guys that would like you.
The Nair Method - Nair is a hair-removal cream. It works by dissolving hair, and works with a fair amount of effectiveness. It may not quite get all of the hair on an area though, and causes reactions in some people. Always test it on a small area of your body a day before you plan on really using it. Nair is not a permanent solution.
Waxing - Waxing involves putting a special wax-type stuff on part of your body (it goes on at a lower temperature than regular wax, so it doesn't hurt), and then giving it one really big yank to pull the hair out. The good point of this is that it's cheap and effective. The downside is that it hurts and that the hair grows back thicker. It's probably not a good solution if you have a particularly thick patch of hair, or want to wax large parts of your body. Waxing is usually done in (straight and gay) salons, but I believe some (less effective) home options exist.
Consider waxing more of a temporary option for a big date rather than an effective long-term solution. Waxing is not a permanent solution.
Electrolysis - Electrolysis involves a certified professional using small electric shocks to destroy the hair follicles over a long period of time. It requires more than one session, and usually leaves a rash for two or three days after the appointment. It is a more expensive solution than waxing (often costing $20-40 or more per session depending on your needs), and must be done every several weeks for up to a year or more. It also has the added downside of being somewhat painful, like a small bee sting every time they remove a hair.
During electrolysis, the shock damages the hair follicle. The bigger the shock, the more it hurts, but the more damage the follicle takes. The hair is then plucked out with a pair of tweezers. Over the next few weeks the hair grows back in, but over several sessions becomes noticeably thinner. Eventually the follicle takes so much damage it ceases producing a hair at all, although this can take a year or more depending on your body and particular type of hair.
Laser Hair Removal - In recent years, laser hair removal has emerged as a new option. It typically only takes a few sessions, but must be done by a qualified practitioner over a longer period of time. The advantage is that it is less painful than the other options, and does become permanent. The downside is that it is very expensive, costing anywhere from $1.5k and up depending on your needs. There are relatively few side effects of laser surgery.
"Miracle" Cures - There are a number of websites on the 'net claiming to sell pills and vitamins you can take at home to help slow your hair growth. Often these products are marketed towards athletes desiring a smooth form. Such claims are typically not verified by the US Food and Drug Administration, and should be considered highly suspect. It's easy to believe these products work when you want to believe in them, but they have never needed to prove their effectiveness in the past. I don't recommend any of these at-home miracle solutions, and suggest you avoid this option.
Regarding embarrassment when looking for a a place to have your (chest, butt, dick) hair removed, I know it's a tough issue. A lot of places aren't hip to the desires of many men to be smooth, especially in more sexual parts of the body. When looking for a place to have this done, your best is to start by looking in your local gay bar guide. These are ideal advertising opportunities for hair removal companies. You may also want to try your local gay/lesbian info line for suggestions, particularly in non-urban areas. They may act a little funny on the phone, but may have a few suggestions for you.
If you are looking to have your genitals or butt it is always a good idea to call the company to confirm in advance they are willing to remove hair in that area of the body. Many places are A-ok with doing it, although some will politely request you seek another location. In that case, don't be embarrassed and hang up. Ask them if they can provide you a referral. They are likely to do so if they know of a good place for you.
Once you set up your appointment, you should be in good shape. Waxing and electrolysis are commonly done by women, although laser surgery will vary. Don't be embarrassed if a woman is working on you - they're professionals at their business and are well-used to it. I had my chest hair (I do have a small amount) electrolyzed, and asked the woman if there was any part of the body she wouldn't work on. Her reply was, "I've done it all, many times..." One other thought - don't forget to tip your the person helping you out. It's customary. : )
Whatever you do, DO NOT EVER stop going out, meeting people, and having sex because you are self-conscious. Hair (like weight, age, or any other attribute) is an individual preference. No matter how smooth or hairy you are, there are a lot of guys that would like you.
Comment by Anonymous on January 21, 2008
In reading through some of the archives of your advice column, I came across the column you did on shaving and the subsequent responses. I am a young man and I own a consulting company that advises manufacturers and retailers in the cosmetics industry. In addition to that, I am just plain ole vain and work hard on my appearance... I didn't end up in my business by accident. I also swam in college (just a good excuse to hang out with naked men and shave my legs) so I have been shaving for a while now. Here are some suggestions for great smooth shaving that you might want to pass along:1. Use a gel form shaving product for your body even if you don't like it for your face. The gel provides more 'slip' for the razor and slides over the curves of the body better. Also, shaving foams are by nature and formulation dehydrating to the skin and can cause further irritation from shaving especially if one is prone to 'ashy' dry legs from shaving or swimming,etc.
2. Most women who shave their bodies find that a brand new blade is more likely to cause cuts and nicks. This is somewhat true but it is also true that a blade that has itself been nicked from tough hairs will cause nicks and scratches. I recommend starting with a new blade and using it on areas that are less prone to cutting and nicking and then proceeding to the other areas once it is slightly used.
3. The best thing to prevent ingrown hairs (which are more common among men because of the coarseness and growth pattern of our hair) is regular exfoliation. Just a good proper scrubbing and/or the use of a lotion daily that contains Alpha Hydroxy Acids which are chemical exfolliants that improve the overall texture of the skin.
You don't want to scrub right after shaving...this would be painful and irritating. As soon as the hair has begun to creep through the skin, then begin scrubbing daily or every other day. Inrown hairs are caused by hairs that grow right under the surface of the skin because they usually can't get through all of the tough old dead skin on the surface. Exfoliation removes that and allows these hairs to grow through without becoming irritated. This will also make for a closer shave if you do it shortly before shaving.
4. One product that I highly recommend and consider to be a miracle elixir is one called Tend-Skin. It can be purchased in many salons and beauty supplies. This product is formulated for those who wax and/or shave and have problems with razor burn, shaving irritation, redness or bumps. And it works! It contains salycilate which is a form of aspirin that calms the redness and irritation caused by hair removal. It is also an exfoliant and prevents ingrown hairs. Finally, it contains alum which stops any bleeding from any unfortunate cuts or nicks. It really is amazing and I endorse products with great reluctance. [Aaron: I've used the stuff, and it works very well.]
One down side with it is that it is drying to the skin so regular application of lotion is recommended along with it but you should do that any way because even the most smooth skin is only enticing when it is nice to see and touch. It also tends to sting a bit. Worth it though. I told a friend about this who shaves his but and has the tell-tale red bumps from shaving there. This product cleared them up and kept them cleared up.
5. Shave with regularity. Shaving is easier and less irritating when it is done with regularity. If you let the hair grow out too long, it will rub against your clothes and actually cause the red bumps that are so unattractive. Consistency is the key. And who cares about a date...don't you want to be your own best boyfriend. I know I do and I have an amazing boyfriend.
I do all of these things with regularity and I shave everything except for some of my bush and my armpits. I rarely ever have bumps or irritation as a result. I know all of this may sound a little anal (no pun intended) but I have found these things to work and no one really ever addresses this issue. Your father might teach you how to shave your face but he probably won't be helping you out with your ass and balls. Your column was great. I just thought I would pass this along as well.
Comment by Anonymous on January 21, 2008
About your column on shaving, there is a good method of shaving that was demonstrated in the GMSMA workshop for novice tops. It involves using a safety razor used for surgery prep and baby powder. NO water or shaving cream. It soothes the skin as you cut and won't leave you feeling that itchy. Just wanted to comment on your extremely interesting column on hair removal, especially as it deals with electric shavers. You might want to advise people that the Norelco lift and cut shavers can be quite painful in those delicate areas. I made the mistake of using it once. Ouch!